Hi Everyone:
By now, I'm sure that most of you know that my Mom, Ginny Gallagher passed away on September 24. She had really struggled the past few months. Obviously our family is still very sad as we try to adjust to her not being here.
This is the eulogy I gave for her on September 29, the feast of Michael the archangel, her favorite angel. After that are a couple of links to her favorite songs for you to hum along to.
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For Mom September 29, 2025
For someone who likes to write as much as I do, this should have been a snap. I should be able to come up with all the right words to pay tribute to our Mom. I’ve written tributes to family and friends who have gone before. It’s really the best way I have to say goodbye and to tell them what they meant to me.
But this is our Mom. The one who brought us into the world and the brought
us up in it. Where do you start?
So I decided to start with my favorite story that Mom told us.
She told it a few times and I never got tired of hearing it.
In the spring of 1968, Mom was a senior at St. Michael’s
academy in Manhattan. One day Robert F. Kennedy was near her school.(not the guy that doesn’t want us to get vaccinated-I mean the original RFK) He was campaigning
to be the Democratic nominee for President
that year. Kennedy was shaking hands along the way, and just as he got close to Mom, two grown men jumped in front of her to get a handshake from him.
Mom was in her St. Michaels uniform, the voting age at that
time was 21, so she figured RFK had no reason to want to shake her hand, and
she turned to walk away.
A second later, she felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned
around and saw Senator Robert F.
Kennedy extending his hand to her and thanking her for coming out to see him.
Weeks later, Senator Kennedy was assassinated at the
Ambassador Hotel in Los Angeles. They flew his body to New York so he could lie
in state at St. Patrick’s Cathedral. On a miserably hot sticky June day that
turned into night, Mom stood in line for
7 and a half hours just to walk by RFK’s casket. Not to kneel, not to say a
prayer, to walk by and get a glimpse. That’s what a man who knew she couldn’t
vote for him, but went out of his way to make sure he appreciated her being
there, meant to her. 7 and a half hours in line, the month she graduated from
high school.
That was my Mom.
At RFK’s funeral, Senator Edward Kennedy of Massachusetts
eulogized his slain brother by saying…
“My brother need not be idealized or enlarged in death beyond
what he was in life. To be remembered simply as a good and decent man, who saw
wrong and tried to right it, saw suffering and tried to heal it, saw war and
tried to end it. “
Mom was much more than a good and decent woman. She was
remarkably smart, wickedly funny, incredibly strong, tough when she needed to be, but always,
always always compassionate.
She studied to be a nurse because like RFK, she saw
suffering and wanted to heal it. That particular journey ended around the time I
was born, as he stayed home to raise myself, Krissy and Katie, but she went
back to work in the schools, first as an assistant, then as a school secretary,
and finally as a NYC DOE Parent coordinator. In every one of those roles, she
made sure that no child’s needs went unattended to, that no parent’s questions
or concerns went un answered or unaddressed. When she retired in 2015, the
principal at the time told a story about how mom once said that her approach to
the job was to assume that “every parent loved their kids as much as I love
mine” The principal said that anybody who worked in a school should have that
same approach.
And any kid who had a parent that loved them as much as Mom
loved us should consider themselves very lucky.
When our Dad was in Vietnam, his supervisor from Chase had
everyone in their department write letters to him. One young lady had just
started there, and was the daughter of a purple heart recipient. Her father,
John P. Raftery, was rescued after being on a boat that was sunk off the North
African coast in 1943. Dad read her letter and couldn’t wait to meet her. When
he came home badly injured, but spirit intact, he got back on his feet, and
eventually dated and married that young new worker who wrote to him in Vietnam.
Mom had a hero for a father and now had a hero as a husband. Neither Raffy or
Dad ever referred to themselves as heroes, but Mom made sure everyone who met
them knew that they were.
For Krissy, Katie and I no one was more loved, protected and
fought for than we were. Every step of the way we knew who had our backs, who
was willing to do whatever she needed to make sure were had whatever we needed,
to make sure we were happy, but to also make sure we were kind, and respectful
to others. I mentioned before she was tough when she had to be, and believe me,
all four of us can vouch for that too.
Her happiest moments were with her grandchildren. She was
crazy about Becky, Timmy and Rachel. In her eyes those 3 could do no wrong.
More than once, Mom caught me shaking my head at something those kids did that
would have landed Kate, Kris or myself in the proverbial doghouse, but made her
laugh out loud.
“That's your problem, not mine Bill” she would say.
And that leads me to what her last great role in our family
was.
To say we were all heartbroken in 2018 when we lost Becky
doesn’t even begin to cut it. For all of us it was a time of darkness and
despair, that of course stays with us to this day.
My birthday was about two weeks after, and a few days
before, Mom called and asked what I wanted to do for it. What I wanted to do
was roll up in ball and do nothing. I had a admittedly deserved reputation for
making a big deal out of my birthday, but to me there was nothing to celebrate.
But Mom, in no uncertain terms told me that was not an
option.
The selfish thing to do was to do nothing. We are a family,
Mom said, and we need to be together as a family to celebrate birthdays,
graduations and anniversaries. We are all in pain, but we can’t stop living. We
need to be there for each other. So figure out what you want to do and where
you want us all to meet up because one way or another we are going to get
through this together.
And that's how we all ended up at Bungalow Bar for birthday brunch on August 5, 2018. Together, as a family.
Now Mom and Becky are together again. It pains our hearts
that they are not here with us, but it’s a comfort to know that they are
probably having a blast together right now.
And she got to spend her last few years at her happy place,
her Summer Place as it were. Mom had scores of friends that she made throughout
her life and all of you hold a special place in her heart.
But these last few years, she got to spend more time with
what the kids nowadays refer to as her OG’s. Her friends from Rockaway were
truly life long. You all still refer to each other by your maiden names which
always cracked us up. And again, whether you met her through St. Mary’s or worked
with her in the schools or anywhere in her life, you were special to her.
One final thing…one day not too long ago, I was driving Mom home from a doctor’s appointment, and when we got to the bridge in Broad Channel, I called Kate to let her know we were close so that she and the aide could come down to get her. It was a simple conversation, Hey Kate, we’re at the bridge. OK Bill we’ll start heading down.
Out of nowhere and to no one in particular, mom yelled out “My kids are so nice!” I bring this up for two reasons:
First, to tell my two sisters how
blessed I am to have them. All that you guys did this past year especially was
nothing short of phenomenal. I described Mom as smart strong tough and
compassionate, and you guys are the embodiment of that. And Steve and Tara,
thank you for all your support and love. We are lucky that you are our family.
But mostly, I think what Mom was trying to say that day was that she had done a good job with us.
Yes you did, Mom, you did an amazing job. You fought for us every step of the way.
You’re fight is now over. You’re job is done. It’s time for you rest. We will be OK from here. We’ll miss you terribly and wish you were here, but we know you are with us always.
Thank you Mom. We love you.
Thank you.
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To everyone who reached out, either by text, phone call, e-mail or social media, please know that every one of those messages were read and appreciated, and that I will get back to each of you as soon as I can. And if you came to the wake or funeral, I thank you from the bottom of my heart and I apologize if I didn't get to talk to you as much as I wanted to.
I ask for your prayers and good thoughts. And I appreciate every single one of you.
God Bless, Stay Safe
and Have a Great Week.
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