Hi!!
So I was out last Saturday night partying like it was 1999. Of course when I woke up the next morning, my body reminded me it was very much 2022, and I was no longer 26 but closing in on 49. Therefore I had even less incentive to stay up and watch the Oscars. Of course, I woke up in the middle of the night and saw all the alerts. Apparently, there was some fisticuffs.
THE OSCARS-Will Smith gets a piece of the Rock
All week I was waiting to delve into this whole mess, give my $0.02, my pointless point of view just like I do for everything else that goes on. Was this an example of a noble gentleman defending his wife, or some primadonna with thin skin and a short fuse? Was this a comedian going over the line, or another example of how we have lost the ability to laugh at ourselves? Was Will Smith out of line? Was Chris Rock out of line? Either or? Neither nor?
Whatever the case may be, as I sat down to start writing about this whole mess, I started to get a feeling that you know what? I just don't give a crap about it as much as I thought I would. Maybe if I had been up and actually saw it happen I would feel different. But right now, I'm kind of, oh, I don't know over it.
Is that going to stop me from writing about it?
Nope. Here goes.
Let me start here. I think Will and Jada Pinkett Smith are weirdos. That's probably not politically correct to say in this day and age, and I am all for live and let live and what you do in your house is your business blah blah blah. I'm sorry though, to me they are just f-cking strange. From their "open marriage" to encouraging their son Jayden to seek emancipation from them, I think they do these things under the guise of being progressive, where I see them doing it to gather attention to themselves.
And for what? These aren't the Kardashian's we are talking about here. Love him or loathe him, Will Smith is a genuine talent in the performing arts. He's a brilliant actor, singer and songwriter. Jada is also multi-talented, and Jayden at his young age is also a brilliant performer. Like Eminem said "Will Smith don't have to cuss in his raps to sell records*." He doesn't. His work and his wife and kids work, on stage, film and studio, should speak for itself.
There is going to come a point in all this where Will Smith goes tearfully on TV and says "I never thought this would blow up into all this, and I wish it would stop." Maybe he does, but I also think there's a part of him that is getting a kick out of seeing his name plastered all over the place this past week. You could tell me I'm wrong about that and make a very compelling case, but that's what I see from my neck of the woods.
Now was he right to do what he did? Absolutely not. There are no set of circumstances where anybody has the right to go slap someone upside the head, and that goes double for national tv. You're not even allowed to do that during a football game. Did Chris Rock go over the line? Maybe, but on the other hand, this is what he does. I ask the same question Mike Lupica asked rhetorically when Don Imus was catching all that flak for what he said about Bill Clinton at the 1996 White House Correspondence Dinner.
"Who did they think they were getting? Bob Hope?"
I'll be the first to admit I don't know much about the condition that Jada Pinkett-Smith has, but it does sound awful. I know a few paragraphs back I said I think they are strange, but I wish them no ill will, and I hope they are able to keep working. I see that Will Smith resigned from the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences, but I hope that doesn't mean he's done in Hollywood. Give him the rest of 2022 off and let him learn his lesson. And for the record, as much as I think the Smith's are weird, they would probably feel the same about us Gallaghers if they ever met us. At the very least, they would consider us dull.
There's another possible solution to all this and I know I've thrown this out there before, but maybe we can all try being a little nicer to each other overall, celebrating what we have in common rather than pointing fingers at each other for where we are different. I know I'm fighting windmills on that one. But it's always worth a shot.
In any event, I'm tired of seeing the replays on TV, tired of hearing about it on the radio and tired of reading about it. If you're tired of reading about it, I'm sorry. I hope you at least read this take on it. But if not, I dig.
BASEBALL: The More Things Change....
So on Thursday the reports came out that Jacob deGrom was going to get an MRI due to some discomfort in his shoulder. It was really like deja vu all over again.
At least on Friday when the Mets announced they were shutting deGrom down for 4 weeks, it seemed on the surface that they had a good reason. Something called a Stress Reaction in the shoulder. And Lord above forgive me, my first reaction was "I'm just glad they didn't say it was a clean MRI"
They spent most of the second half of the season lying about all his MRI's coming back clean, until there were a couple of weeks left in the season and the team was hopelessly under.500. Then Sandy Alderson came out and said there was a sprain in deGrom's UCL. In other words, the MRI's weren't clean and deGrom's elbow had a tear in one of the ligaments.
Now, am I convinced that the Mets are being straight up about this latest setback. Hardly. I can't even bring myself to say it to be honest, but I really have no idea if or when we will see #48 back out on the mound for us. But at least the team has given us all something we can look up on WebMD and act like we know WTF we are talking about.
And even with all the bull$h-t going on, I still find myself anxiously awaiting the start of the season later on this week, even though I'm not optimistic about either of NY's teams chances this year. Even before deGrom got hurt, I had concerns about the Mets rotation after Jake and Max Scherzer (who apparently is having some issues of his own). The bullpen wasn't really addressed properly and I still think they could use another power bat somewhere in the lineup.
As for the Yankees, their big move was getting rid of Gary Sanchez, the matador himself. They have more than a few issues, rotation and lineup. Like the Mets, health will be a big factor.. If Aaron Judge and Giancarlo Stanton can play 140 games, if Luis Severino's arm holds up. Also I feel like other teams in both Eastern Divisions added talent to their rosters. The Braves are the defending World Champions, and were able to let their best player (Freddie Freeman) leave via free agency because they fleeced the Oakland A's out of Matt Olson. The Phillies added two guys who each hit 30 HR's last year in Kyle Schwarber and Nick Castellanos. in the AL, the Blue Jays added Matt Chapman to an already loaded lineup. Not to mention the Rays are still dangerous.
I guess just the fact that baseball is back and we don't have to spend that time arguing over who should have started Game 6 of the 1973 World Series** should be enough to carry us forward. It all starts this Thursday... Mets-Nationals in DC, Yanks-Red Sox in the Bronx.
FAST FOOD: Introducing Robo-Burger
A mall in Jersey City became the first in our fair nation, if not the world, to introduce a vending machine that distributes hamburgers.
The Newport Centre Mall in Jersey City this week opened Robo-Burger, a 12 foot box that contains a refrigerator a grill and a self cleaning unit. According to USA Today, the burger is Pat LaFrieda Beef, the cheese is aged Wisconsin Cheddar and the ketchup is from Heinz.
The geniuses who came up with this, Dan Braido, Audley Wilson were classmates at Carnegie Mellon University and worked on this project for 16 years. That's dedication man. When they had a solid prototype, they hooked up with restauranteur Andy Seliegl. Together they got the project over the finish line. The rest as they say is history.
The cleaning system removes all bacteria so there's no risk of getting sick. Also the unit is designed that if let's say the refrigeration unit is busted, the grill won't cook a burger that's not stored at the proper temperature. In other words, John Taffer won't be taking a Louisville Slugger to it because of poor storage quality.
And it looks to be very user friendly too. The standard robo-burger is cooked ton order on a toasted bun with ketchup and mustard. You can adjust any or all of those choices (for example I wouldn't eat a burger with mustard on it if you were torturing me for information).
They actually threw a parade in Jersey City for the St. Peter's Peacocks for their miraculous run to the Elite 8. Now Jersey City should throw another parade, in honor of three of it's native sons who may have just revolutionized the fast food genre forever.
If I was the photographer on this, I may have suggested this lady move about a foot to her left.
WEEKLY MAIL CORRECTIONS
1) In reporting about baseball’s new CBA, we said that the shift had been outlawed. Apparently that is not the case, at least for this season. What actually happened was that the MLBPA granted MLB the ability to unilaterally implement three rule changes for the 2023 season..1) adding a pitch clock, 2) increasing the size of the bases (huh?) and yes, 3) banning the shift. Baseball would have to give the union a 45 day notice before putting these new measures in. Also, it was decided this week that MLB will continue the asinine practice of putting a runner on first to start extra innings (in the regular season at least) About the only thing we actually did report accurately was that there would be no more 7 inning double-headers and that the DH was coming to the NL. WM regrets the error
2) But now here’s a error we don’t regret, the only thing I regret about it is that it won’t amount to much I’m sure, but remember how last week I was lamenting how gawd-awful I am at filling out an NCAA tournament bracket? Well it turns out I’m not quite as inept as I thought I was. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still pretty bad, but I’m not like 1962 Mets awful, just merely 2003 Mets awful.
For all my utter incompetence, I did manage to predict the Kansas Jayhawks into the finals. Kansas’ win over Villanova (who truth be told I probably would have been rooting for since I like their coach Jay Wright) catapulted me from near the bottom to 17th place. Nothing to write home about, but still a lot better than being third from last. I’m closer to first than I am to the bottom.
My. Final Four was Texas Tech (because I couldn’t put Duke there) Kentucky, (whose overrated coach John Calipari got himself knocked out in the first round by our St. Peter’s Peacocks) Arizona (which of all my blunders this is the one I regret the most because Arizona always folds) and Kansas. I didn’t exactly reinvent the wheel picking Kansas, as they were I believe, either the first or second ranked team in the country, but they are making me look a bit smarter than I really am.
Theres few times in my life where I have rooted for Mike Kryzewski but unfortunately Saturday night was one of them. I had a feeling the game was going to be a classic, but I did manage to not watch one second of it. For as much as I can’t stand Duke, I HATE NORTH CAROLINA. Always have.
So my suggestion is that you all go clear out your 401K’s tomorrow morning, download the Draft Kings app, bet everything on North Carolina, (since I have Kansas winning it all, and as a reminder I HATE NORTH CAROLINA)
And
Make
It
Rain.
If you are watching the Grammys tonight, enjoy. Hopefully everyone behaves themselves.
Stay Safe
and Have a Great Week
*well I do, so f-ck him and f-ck you too… From the 2000 song The Real Slim Shady.
**myself, Howie Rose and Gary Cohen all say George Stone.Karl (the Ace) Ludwig and the only opinion who counted Yogi Berra said Tom Seaver on 3 days rest.
I'M WITH YOU 100% REGARDING N C
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