Hey There:
So last night I published a special about the George Floyd protests. I hope you all read it and took it to heart.
For now, we'll address some other things going on in our neck of the woods.
DOCTOR! MY EYES-Jackson Browne
March 12. The day the earth began to stand still as far as I was concerned.
The previous night, the NBA had suspended it's season. That day the NHL suspended theirs, as well as MLB. March Madness was cancelled. The next day was most of our kids last day in a classroom.
That afternoon I had an appointment to see the ophthalmologist. I had long suspected that my days of not needing glasses had come to an end. Too many things had become difficult to read. I didn't notice till Tara told me that I often read things with my left eye shut. That couldn't have been good.
So when the doctor gave me the exam and told me the news, it wasn't exactly earth shattering. But of course the way he was talking, I was classified somewhere between Mr. Magoo and the Al Pacino character from Scent of a Woman. "Once you get these glasses, you'll be amazed at what you couldn't see." He kept telling me.
Before I went to see him, Tara had given me some advice, "Whatever you do, don't let him sell you anything. Get the script and we'll get it filled somewhere else." But as soon as he was done examining me he shuffled me into a room with about 100 frames and said "Pick one out and we'll fill it here for you." He went from eye doctor to TV pitchman telling me "I charge less than the stores do." maybe he did, but the way he was talking plus Tara's warning kind of had me thinking on my feet. A lady came in and had me try on a pair of frames that I really didn't like. Before she came in, I had tried on a pair that I thought would make me look like John Lennon*, but apparently those weren't for sale.
Finally, just to get the hell out of there, I told her I needed my wife to come with me, because after all, she was going to be the one stuck looking at me all day. (I really should have brought my co-workers, but I digress) She said she understood and I grabbed the script and split.
My eyes had been slightly dilated. Not enough that I couldn't drive, just enough to be disconcerting. Thankfully the drive back to work was short, but between hearing everything closing down and the fog that was my vision, March 12, 2020 goes to the top of the list of bizarre days in my life.
And of course, who else closed down but almost every eyeglass place in the country. So despite the fact that I was made to feel like I'd be a menace to society without glasses, I soldiered through for 2 1/2 months. Finally, the America's Best in my hood re-opened, and I went there two weeks ago and finally got the scripted filled. They came in on Thursday, but because there's a Target in that strip mall and there was a planned protest, they were closing early. So I went and got them on Saturday morning.
As soon as I put them on, I could read the fine print under one of the signs on the wall. The Dr. was right, it was unbelievable what I could now see. Of course the adjustment period has been somewhat discombobulating. But the upside as they say is tremendous.
And not to pat myself on the back too much, but I like the way they look. I've always gotten complemented on my blue eyes. And I was afraid that getting glasses, to go along with my big nose and multiple chins (not to mention my shaggy pandemic hair) would take away from my one appealing facial feature. But I think I'm rocking it pretty well. They are transition lenses too, so they turn into sunglasses outside. (If I was Corey Hart I'd be out of luck). So to all my bespectacled readers out there, I now join amongst your ranks. To us I say hear hear (or see see as it were)
SPORTS: Basketball and Hockey Returns?
Last week NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman put forth a plan to conclude the 2019-2020 hockey season. This week the NBA Board of Governors put forth a plan to re-open their season as well.
HOCKEY
They are scrapping the rest of the regular season and having a 24 team playoffs, 12 teams from each conference. 7 teams are staying home.
Phase 2 entails teams returning to their training facilities in small groups. Phase 3 is formal training camp to start no sooner than July 1st. Sometime in late July early August, the playoffs will begin.
The top 4 teams in each conference will play each other in a round robin to determine seedings. The rest of the teams will play 5 vs 12, 6 vs 11, 7 vs 10 and 8 vs 9 in a best of 5. The winners go on, the losers go home.
The dates for the playoffs haven't been determined, nor has whether the 2nd round will be a best of 5 or best of 7. The conference finals and the Stanley Cup Final will both be best of 7.
They are going to play in 2 hub cities with no fans. The cities being considered are Los Angeles, Las Vegas, Dallas, Chicago, Pittsburgh, Vancouver, Toronto, Edmonton, Minneapolis and Columbus. By my count, that's 7 Western cities and 3 Eastern.
I'm going to predict Columbus for the Eastern Hub and Vegas in the west. Los Angeles and Chicago are big cities who like New York were hit hard by COVID-19. Minneapolis has bigger issues right now. I can't see any Canadian cities wanting to host, as the fear of the virus coming back across the border. That leaves Pittsburgh, Dallas, Columbus and Vegas. Given my theory that Bettman has a deal with Mario Lemieux to keep the Penguins in perpetual contention, I guess Pittsburgh can't be ruled out. But with Vegas being the NHL's newest home, and Columbus being a big enough city to host but small enough to contain the virus, that's what I'm basing my prediction on.
The Rangers and Islanders would both qualify, while the Devils are done for the year.
No dates have been set yet, as the NHL is still working with local authorities before even contemplating dates.
BASKETBALL
Their post lockdown plan is more specific and a bit more complicated. 22 of the 30 teams would be returning (our NY Knicks, mercifully, are not one of the 22). They would play 8 seeding games to eliminate the 6 teams that are less than 6 games out of a playoff spot before the playoffs would start.
According to NBA.com...
The seven teams in each conference with the best records (regular-season games + seeding games) would have clinched a playoff spot. The usual tie-breaker scenarios would be in place for those seeds. The eighth seed could potentially come down to a play-in tournament. If the team with the eighth-best record in its conference is more than four games ahead of the team with the ninth-best record in the same conference, no play-in tournament would be necessary. The final playoff berth would simply go to the team with the eighth best record (regular-season games + seeding games).
But if the team with the eighth-best record in its conference is four games or fewer ahead of the team with the ninth-best record in the same conference, then we'll have a battle for the final spot between those two teams.
The tournament would basically be a best-of-two series -- where the No. 9 seed would have to win two head-to-head matchups to take over the No. 8 spot.
All their games would be played at Disney World, with the players all being housed at Disney hotels. (I haven't gotten confirmation on the rumor that based on their records, the Bucks and Lakers will be staying at the Grand Floridian while the Wizards and Suns will stay at the Pop Resort.)
The anticipated dates are July 31 to start the seeding games and the NBA Finals to go no later than October 12.
For both sports, all of this is subject to an agreement with the league and their respective players associations as well as whatever government protocols are in place.
Look, as interesting and fun it would be to pop on the TV the night of my birthday with a cold one to watch my Rangers in a playoff game, part of me wonders if we are better off just chalking these seasons up to circumstances beyond their control and lets try it again next season. I mean if the NBA Finals are going to end around October 12, that would mean the Stanley Cup would be awarded maybe a week before? So now when would the 2020-21 season start? I guess I'm just wondering why you'd screw up two seasons instead of one. As I will point out to my dying day, Bettman had no issue cancelling a whole season to get his precious f-cking salary cap. No reasonable person would blame him for not having a Cup Champion this season. I realize they are trying to fill a void and trust me, I'll be watching if they can pull this off.
Of course one reason why I'm hoping they do is because the lords of baseball can't seem to get their $h-t together.
BASEBALL
The one sport that could get things rolling, play a good part of their season, have a playoff and award a champion in reasonable time, is of course doing none of the above because they are fighting over, what else, money.
So let me sum this up: When the pandemic postponed the season, MLB and the Players Association came to an agreement by which the players would be paid on a pro rated basis once the season started. If 1/3 of the season was lost, the players would still get 2/3 of their salaries. Fairly straightforward, even a Math dunce like myself can follow that.
But there was also language in the agreement that the "economic feasibility" of playing without fans in the stadium would be discussed. And now that's the hangup. The owners want the players to take a further pay cut, since they are missing out on gate receipts and concessions etc.
The players are saying that they are risking their health and already losing money so no more cuts will be acceptable.
Meanwhile, I'm arguing with Karl (the Ace) Ludwig about whether Yogi Berra should have started George Stone in Game 6 of the 1973 World Series or brought back Tom Seaver on 3 days rest.**
I've seen enough work stoppages in sports to realize that at the end of the day, it all comes down to the big mamoo (as Cosmo Kramer called it)
But on the other hand, with millions of Americans out of work, and our national psyche severely strained, both sides really do need to get this straightened out soon. The optics of millionaires fighting with billionaires is never good, but now its like a million times worse. And if we're all watching hockey and basketball when we should be watching baseball, that's really gonna make baseball look bad.
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I know we've all had a tough time of it lately, but look at it this way: You didn't have a judge throw out your defamation lawsuit because there was nothing anybody could say about you that was worse than what the truth about you is. So if you need something to be thankful about this week, be thankful you are not Lenny Dykstra.
https://www.abajournal.com/news/article/lenny-dykstras-reputation-was-so-tarnished-that-he-wasnt-defamed-by-book-judge-rules
And finally, with all the protests going on, I forgot to mention something cool that happened last Saturday. The United States put two people back in space for the first time since 2011.
I was in transit so I missed the launch, but was thrilled to see everyone who posted something about it Saturday afternoon. Keep this in mind: In December, 1968 after the murders of Martin Luther King and Bobby Kennedy, Apollo 8 was the first manned spacecraft to orbit the moon, bringing a turbulent year to a positive, hopeful end. And in July 1969, with Vietnam raging on, Apollo 11 landed the first humans on the moon. It's amazing how space travel seems to come when America needs some .healing.
Stay safe everyone
and Have a Great Week
*The glasses, and maybe losing about 150 pounds or so and maybe I'd bear a slight resemblance. I now have the hair for it.
** Yogi brought Seaver back on three days rest with the Mets up 3-2 and they ended up losing in 7 games. I say Stone should have started Game 6 with a fully rested Seaver ready for Game 7. Ace says that's bull$h-t, that anybody worth their salt came back on short rest back then and who the hell was George Stone anyway? The real irony of all this was I was 2 months old when this WS took place and Ace was 2 months away from being born. So there's that.
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