Weekly Mail April 26, 2020

Hey Everybody:

I hope everyone is hanging in there. Saturday was one of those beautiful spring days that made it very hard to shelter in place. But as the numbers go down, it becomes more important to do just that. We're getting there.  We just have to hang in.

Onto the news.....



BASEBALL- JRod to buy Mets?

One of the many downsides to the Mets sale to hedge fund billionaire Steve Cohen going belly up was that it allowed for the possibilities that someone with less deep pockets or less business acumen would come in and make a play for the franchise. As hard as it is to believe, there are some out there who are less qualified than even the Wilpon family to own a baseball team.

Enter Alex Rodriguez and Jennifer Lopez.

Yes both of these egomaniacs are enormously wealthy. A-Rod made his millions with a combination of his baseball talent and performance enhancing drugs. J-Lo of course is a multi talented singer, dancer and actress. Not to mention insanely hot. But do we think they can run a franchise?

This just sounds like a bad idea all around. I can't imagine this being any better than what Derek Jeter is doing down in Miami. That has been a total $h-tshow.

Maybe I'm being unfair. Maybe it's the fact that I really don't care for either one of them. Do you all remember how you couldn't open a newspaper, turn on a radio or TV without hearing something about J-Lo and Ben Affleck's wedding that never happened?  I give Jenny from the Block her props, but damn she is everywhere.

And no athlete in my life has ever hogged up the spotlight as much as Alex Rodriguez. There have been the good (his insane statistics) the bad ( his complaining about the spotlight as he does everything he can to make sure it's always on him) and the ugly (the whole steroids scandal) he's just someone I wish would just go away. Take J-Lo. take all your $$$ and go live happily ever after.

Let someone else buy the Mets.


FOOTBALL: The NFL Draft

Avid readers of this blog know about my internal battle with the NFL.

I used to really like football. But of all the major sports, I feel like the NFL is the one that takes the most advantage of it;s fans. It rewards poor behavior. Spouse/Child beaters, drug addicts, gun nuts, shit, they even let and convicted dog murderer back into the league. Not to mention that the team that has dominated the sport the last 20 years, the New England Patriots, were twice caught cheating.

So I have tried, and more often than not failed to stay away. I'll watch the Jets because they are my team, but I rarely watch the Giants, and I almost never watch Thursday, Monday or even Sunday night football. And the only reason I watched this past Super Bowl was well there were a couple of reasons 1) The Pats weren't in it. 2) I wanted to root on my sister's favorite player Pat Mahomes, and 3) my sister in law Megan made dinner for us that night.

The other thing is, once the Super Bowl is over, it means baseball is coming, which means the spring is coming. Not having football dominating the sports airwaves is a welcome respite.

But with sports shut down, there is no March Madness, no NBA/NHL Playoffs and very likely no baseball. So the only thing that was happening was NFL Free agency and the NFL Draft which took place on Thursday night.

The NFL Draft has become a huge spectacle. Last year they held it in Nashville and it pretty much shut down the whole of downtown Nashville. This year, everybody, including commissioner Roger Goodell worked from their houses. It was like everything else these past 6 weeks, weird.

I didn't watch the first round on Thursday because I was playing Oscars Trivia with DJ's@Work, but I caught some of the 2nd round. I was waiting for the Jets to make their pick, and when it got to their turn, they traded the pick to Seattle. So I shut it off.

The guy the Jets drafted in the first round is a beast. 6 foot 7 370 pounds and fast. He also failed a drug test at the combine. Who knows. He could be D'Brickashaw Ferguson, he could be Turd Ferguson.

The Giants for the second year in a row, seems like they drafted someone others thought shouldn't have been drafted that high. So far Daniel Jones has turned out ok, let's see how this OT they drafted turns out.


BASKETBALL: Bulls Documentary

I love the ESPN 30 for 30 documentaries. My favorite was the one they did about June 17, 1994, one of the most remarkable days in America, sports or otherwise (the OJ White Bronco chase, the Rangers parade, Game 5 of the NBA Finals at the Garden etc.)

They are currently doing a 10 part documentary about the Chicago Bulls 1997-98 season titled The Last Dance, and because of the lack of live sports going on right now, it's apparently the most anticipated documentary since PBS's An American Family.

I'm torn, You all know how I feel about those Jordan/Pippen/Jackson Bulls. After the 21st Century Patriots, they are my least favorite dynasty.

And yet the story itself is somewhat intriguing. Phil Jackson had already decided he wasn't coming back the following season, Michael Jordan was strongly considering hanging up his Nike's (for the second time) and the coach Bulls GM Jerry Krause wanted to bring in, Iowa State coach Tim Floyd, inspired none of the players. Hence the title of the series.

I watched a bit of the first episode, but not sure about the rest of it. I know how it turns out and 22 years later I'm still pissed about it. Isn't there enough misery with this pandemic, why should I subject myself to more of it.


Alrighty then, I'm tapped out.  Thanks for reading. Stay Safe

and Have a Great Week

Weekly Mail April 19, 2020

Hi Everyone

I'm sorry we didn't post last week. I hope everyone had a Happy Easter and a Happy Passover. Again, this has been the weirdest set of holidays in my lifetime and I'm sure it most of yours. We usually spend Easter with my side of the family. But since we were all locked in, we ordered in from Outback Steakhouse and watched DJ Paddy Tubbs spin his tunes on the Corona virus Quarantine Virtual Bar.

                                               Timmy and I watching DJ Paddy Tubbs on Easter Sunday




The other night I did I virtual happy hour with WM Co-Editors (Razor) Ray McGarvey and Karl (the Ace) Ludwig, and they were complimenting me on my hair. Not sure exactly what they could see through the computer lens, but now I have those mutton chop white sideburns that haven't been in style since the early 70's.






Lorne Greene from a late season of Bonanza


I suppose I can get rid of those myself, but the rest of my hair is not looking to sharp either. Of course with the barbers and hairdressers all being closed due to COVID-19, we are all in the same boat.





AUTO RACING- One of my favorite movies as a kid was 1981's Cannonball Run, about a car race between Connecticut and California. Burt Reynolds, Dom deLuise, Farrah Fawcett, Roger Moore, and Rat Packers Dean Martin and Sammy Davis Jr. led the all-star cast.

The Times did an article on Saturday saying that thanks to the Corona Virus, the highways are relatively clear and real life cannonballers are breaking the NY to California record on a regular basis. This week according to the Times' Jon Branch the record fell last week and is expected to continue to fall as more of them attempt to do it.

Highway Patrols across the country are keeping their eyes out for these speed demons, but despite the fact that speeding tickets have gone up dramatically, (while other crimes have dropped) it appeared these real life Cannonball Runs are going strong, Who knows, because of the lack of sports programming, maybe one of the networks will pick up on it. We can all gather 'round the TV and watch real cross country racing.



POLITICS-I'm trying not to get involved in the politics of this thing too much, but that was an interesting little spat between the Dope from Park Slope and Andrew Cuomo on last Saturday afternoon was it not?  Right now, our governor is the closest thing we have to must see TV.



SKIN CARE- Is anyone else having this issue? I've used so much Purell on my hands that my skin is starting to crack. Squirting that stuff on my hands now makes it feel like I'm sticking my hand in a hot stove. Seeing what alcohol based sanitizer is doing to my hands makes my shutter at the thought of what drinking all this booze is doing to my innards. Don't get me wrong, I'm still going to have my red wine and beer, but it does makes me wonder.



PRO WRESTLING- Did anyone catch Wrestlemania 36 a couple of weeks back?  I haven't watched Wrestling in years. Back in the late 90's I kind of got back into it, with my brother in law Steve, my sister Katie and Ed (Auggie) DePuy. But I hadn't watched Wrestlemania since Hulk Hogan and Macho Man Randy Savage were duking it out.

So because Vince McMahon might be the worst person in the world to work for, and his buddy President Trump decided that Pro Wrestling in an essential business, Wrestlemania carried on two Sunday's ago. It was supposed to be held at Raymond James Stadium in Tampa, but they ended up taping it a couple weeks prior at the WWE Training Center in Orlando.

Timmy's been a trooper throughout this whole thing. So when he asked if we could get Wrestlemania I agreed. I remember Wrestlemania 3 at the Pontiac Silverdome in Detroit. There were 93,000 people there, the largest indoor audience at the time. Wrestlemania 36 had the lowest audience in history, a big fat zero.

It reminded me of as a kid playing CYO ball in an empty gym on a Saturday morning. If you had the first game, they would turn the heat on when they first got in there, so heaven forbid you were siting on the bench, you froze your ass off till about halftime when the heat kicked on a bit.

I don't know what the temp was there, but it was so empty you could hear everything.

Do any of you remember when they used to show the WWF on Channel 9 on Saturday mornings? I was trying to explain this to Timmy. They would show the stars wrestle against nobodys. During the matches, the voice of Howard Finkel (who passed this week) would come on and advertise wrestling cards, either the monthly ones at Madison Square Garden and the Nassau Coliseum, or at the Mid-Hudson Civic Center in Poughkeepsie. (When my aunt and uncle moved up there a few years later, I was stoked when we drove by the Mid-Hudson Civic Center that I had heard advertised on those Saturday morning Wrestling shows.)  Even those tomato can specials had fannies in the seats. There was nothing like that here at all. Just bizarre.



BASEBALL- And now baseball is discussing a number of plans to play games with no fans. One plan has all the games being played in Arizona. Another has the games being played at the team's spring training facilities, half the teams in Florida, the other half in Arizona.

The all games in Arizona plan I can't really see working. There's a reason the D'backs play in a retractable roof stadium. Tara and I were in Phoenix in June 2007, and it was 115 degrees down there. You'd either have to play at 8 in the morning (which might actually work) or 10 at night (which wouldn't).

The Florida/Arizona plan might have a better shot. The winner of the Florida League would play the winner of the Arizona League in the World Series.

GRAPEFRUIT LEAGUE (FLORIDA)

• NORTH: New York Yankees, Philadelphia Phillies, Toronto Blue Jays, Detroit Tigers, Pittsburgh Pirates.
• SOUTH: Boston Red Sox, Minnesota Twins, Atlanta Braves, Tampa Bay Rays, Baltimore Orioles.
• EAST: Washington Nationals, Houston Astros, New York Mets, St. Louis Cardinals, Miami Marlins.

CACTUS LEAGUE (ARIZONA) 

• NORTHEAST: Chicago Cubs, San Francisco Giants, Arizona Diamondbacks, Colorado Rockies, Oakland Athletics.
• WEST: Los Angeles Dodgers, Chicago White Sox, Cincinnati Reds, Cleveland Indians, Los Angeles Angels.
• NORTHWEST: Milwaukee Brewers, San Diego Padres, Seattle Mariners, Texas Rangers, Kansas City Royals.

Based on this structure, the Mets would be in the toughest division. The two World Series participants from 2019 plus the NL Runnerup Cardinals. The Yanks meanwhile have three of the worst teams from 2019 in their division.

I was discussing this with Ace and Razor the other night, and they both said that with the dearth of quality programming, they will take baseball back anyway they can get it. "Let them play on the darkside of the f-cking moon for all I care." Ace said.

I don't know. I miss sports terribly, but I'd almost rather wait till they can play at their own stadiums in front of fans. If that means no baseball in 2020, so be it. It would suck, for sure, but we've already lost March Madness, hockey and pro basketball. (The fact that the NFL is the only sport that hasn't lost a step during this whole pandemic is one more thing to make me miserable)  Can they guarantee the safety of the ball players? How are they going to televise these games?

Lots of questions, not a ton of answers.


ADVERTISING- The other day, I was listening to WFAN and they had a commercial for a Cadillac Dealership out here on the Island. The person in the commercial said that the dealership was on-line and available to help with all your "New Cadillac needs"

I realize every product in the world wants to stay relevant during the pandemic, I really do. I have saved a slew of e-mails from companies saying they know we are going through tough times and they are here for us. That's nice to know. Here's the thing. Unless you are making Hand Sanitizer, Cleaning Wipes, toilet paper, or food, chances are you're not really needed. And if you need a new Caddy at a time like this. you are more the problem than the solution.


CLASS OF 2020- So the latest trend on Facebook is having us old farts putting up our high school graduation pictures to "show support for the Class of 2020."

I have no issue trying to help these poor kids. Timmy is in 6th grade, which in the Oceanside Public Schools is a big year. They get a field trip, a dance (I think) and of course they graduate to middle school in June. The trip has been cancelled, the dance (if they have one) is in jeopardy, and who knows what kind of graduation ceremony they are going to have.

But I know Tim will eventually have other graduations and proms and stuff in his future. Those kids who are supposed to graduate from high school this year are really getting screwed. And whatever we can do as a society to make it up to them, I'm all ears for ideas on that.

But posting OUR high school pictures?

Is showing the Class of 2020 what a geek I was in 1991 going to make them feel better? It might generate a few laughs, but it won't improve their situation.


******************************************************************************

So one of the issues I had last week was that I had a bad case of writers block. Without live sports, and not wanting to weigh in too much politically till this is over, there's not much to write about. I will do my best to get this out Weekly, but it may be more like a bi-weekly thing for a while. We'll see.

Thanks so much for hanging with me. Please continue to keep our essential workers in your prayers. Especially our nurses, doctors and grocers.

Wash your hands, stay 6 feet apart, wear a mask


And Have a Great Week

Weekly Mail April 5, 2020

Hey Everybody:

Sorry we didn't publish last week, and I'm kind of embarrassed to admit why I didn't. I did one of those virtual happy hours with my friends and got a little to well,m happy. That made for a rough Sunday.

But we are back this week and well, I mean, what's there to say? There's no sports to complain about, no real gossip we can have fun with. The 2020 election is pretty much on hold for now, and to be honest, I've decided I'm going to lay off criticizing the government for now, both the federal, state and local. Right now, I just feel like the best thing is to try to be positive, try to stay together in spirit (obviously not physically)  and to stick this thing out as best we can.

If you are someone who is inclined to pray, please do so for all the people that are stricken with this virus and their families. Also, please pray for the first responders, doctors, cops, firemen, and especially the nurses who are fighting this battle. Also for those working in pharmacies and grocery stores, the aptly names essential employees.

I've stopped watching the news, which I'm almost ashamed to admit. When 9/11 happened, I was like addicted to the news. All I wanted to know was, who did it and what were we going to do about it.

I'd still love to know how this all started, was it really someone eating bat soup? Was it environmental, something that just came out of the blue? Or was it something more sinister. I really do hope someone gets to the bottom of that. Because assuming we do flatten the curve and get out of this, we sure as $h-t can't go through this again.

But now, all the news is bad. It's people dying, it's health care workers not having enough PPE, it's a lot if name calling and finger pointing.

Social Media has been both a blessing and a curse, but I'll focus on the blessings:

First of all, my hats off again to the folks who created the Coronavirus Quarantine Virtual Bar. Between the hysterical memes and the live music, they have been a godsend. The other night, my man Paddy Tubs started DJ'ing on his deck in the back of his house. You could see everyone on the West side of Broad Channel dancing on their back decks. All while keeping a safe distance.

Later on, Jamesy and Timmy had a trivia contest on Facebook live. So good to see those guys in action as they spun awesome tunes between questions.

And then there has been my personal favorite.. A great guy named Patrick Grady created a Facebook page called Brooklyn-Queens CYO Basketball. Are you kidding me? How many times have I come on here and waxed poetic about my CYO basketball career? That page was made for me.

And don't get me wrong.. It's not because I was a great player-I wasn't even close to being a great player. Twice, I led my team in DNP's.  But I also made the all-star team in 8th grade, but that's all irrelevant. It's the stories, the characters, the memories.

Thanks to this page, I’ve reconnected with some great friends from high school. So awesome.

On Friday night, I was talking with WM co-editors Ace and Razor, and I was telling them about this page. We started coming up with stories ourselves and came to the conclusion that some of this stuff you couldn't get away with now. One of these days, I may write about some of these stories, if I can get those involved to promise not to sue. LOL


So what I have been doing is some reading- Here are a couple of book reviews- Speaking of Hoops...


Loose Balls- The Short Wild Life of the American Basketball Association. By Terry Pluto

The story is told directly by the players, coaches and executives involved. So when I saw in the cast of characters that one of the people was Al Bianchi, and that his current job was listed as GM of the Knicks, I thought maybe I wouldn't enjoy the book as it had to have been at least 30 hyears old. (It was-it came out in 1990)

But in many ways that was better because the stories were still relatively fresh. The ABA had a few really good teams, and a lot of really bad ones. They played their games in some interesting arenas, some with no heat or hot water. The three point shot and the slam dunk contest were all invented in the ABA. Moses Malone, Dr. J, George (the Iceman) Gervin and Artis Gilmore all started their careers there.

To be honest, I haven't finished it yet, but I've read enough of it to recommend it. If you're a basketball fan or just a sports fan who likes wacky stories from the early 70's, I think you'll dig this book.

4 Auggies.


America's Last Great Newspaper War: The Death of Print in a Two Tabloid Town
By: Mike Jaccarino

Mike Jaccarino was a runner for the Daily News. A runner is basically the person who gets sent to cover a story, then calls in their quotes/notes to the rewrite people on the city desk. I did that for the Post back in the day. Jaccarinio started right after I had stopped running, so we never met. (At least I don't think we did)

But he talks about going up against some folks from the Post who are good friends of mine. Perry Chairmonte, Jen Fermino, Erin Calabrese, Lorena Mongelli, the legendary (and fellow Donovan's patron) CJ Sullivan, and last but not least, my man Tom Liddy.

I loved the book, but really only because I lived it and knew many of the characters.In addition to my aforementioned peeps, he talks about Kerry Burke and Melissa Grace. Sometimes when you knew you were trying to get the same angle, runners from the News and Post would make a deal. I'll leave if you leave. Or you might even work together. Melissa and I were "married and divorced" before I officially married Tara. We played a married couple going to visit a sick relative to get into a hospital, another time we pretended to be brother and sister visiting our mother. You didn't do that too often because you were competing with each other, but it was a way to keep an eye on your opponent.

Jaccarino's got a bunch of stories like that. If you're not a newspaper junkie, it might not be your cup of tea. As one of my all time favorite colleagues Billy Gorta once said, "I love hot dogs, but I'm not interested in going to the Sabrett Hot Dog Factory to see how they are made."

I'm giving it 4.5 Auggies cuz I really enjoyed it. The stories he tells are good.


OK Folks. Stay Safe, and if you can Stay Home.

Have a Great Week