Weekly Mail June 24, 2018

Took last week off to attend the grammar school graduation party of my good friend Liam McGarvey at the Grandstand in Maspeth. Always fun being back in the hood, catching up with my crew. Also nice not having to trek into the Manhattan, got to spend Saturday night with Tara and Tim.

Anyway let’s get right to it....


POLITICS: The Immigration Battle

Immigration Officer #2: Where'd you learn to speak the English, Tony?

Tony Montana: Uh, in a school. And my father, he was, uh, from the United States. Just like you, ya know? He was a Yankee. Uh, he used to take me a lot to the movies. I learn. I watch the guys like Humphrey Bogart, James Cagney. They, they teach me to talk. I like those guys. 

(IMDB)

My reasons for posting the above scene from Scarface are twofold. 1) I believe that like Tony Montana, President Trump has based a lot of his policies on the movies that he's seen. For example, after Robert DeNiro dropped an f-bomb in the direction of him at the Tony Awards, Trump figured DeNiro had been suffering from blows he took filming Raging Bull, not factoring in that perhaps that was a stunt double.

Also I believe that having probably watched the opening scenes of Scarface, I'm guessing Trump is picturing the folks crossing the Rio Grande as thousands of Tony Montanas, looking to come into the US to deal cocaine, not pay taxes and marry Michele Pheiffer.  My friends, I'm not being insensitive or facetious. I truly believe this is how his mind operates.

All that having been said, what we saw down on the US/Mexico border last week was heartbreaking. And look, anybody who knows me well, knows I'm a hawk on immigration.  I know there are awful things going on in other countries, and I still believe we are a beacon of hope in the world. I still believe if you want to come here, you need to do so in a way that you can be documented.

But there had to be a better way to accomplish this than what was going on last week.

I tried to listen to all the arguments on all sides. Who passed the original law? Aren't you separated from your kids is you break the law anyway? Is it breaking the law if you are seeking asylum? It's Trump's fault, it's Obama's fault, it's Bill/Hillary Clinton's fault.

I'm not a legal expert. And again, I'm to the right on immigration issues.

But this couldn't be allowed to happen.

If it's fake news, if kids aren't being separated from their parents and put in cages, show us the proof. I watch CBS This Morning (and not Fox and Friends like many of you think I do) when I get a few minutes in the morning, and I saw Gayle King describe what she saw and it wasn't good. You think she's making it up because she is an Obama supporter? Then prove her wrong, go in there and get photos of kids playing like they are at Disney World.

I don't think you are going to.

I don't have the answers, nor do I pretend that I do, but I know what went on down there last week? That certainly wasn't the answer.

That was a disgrace.



BTW.... Those of you who predicted Trump would be kicked out of office within 12-18 months? This past Wednesday marked 17 months complete. Tick tock....


BASEBALL: Thor vs. Utley revisited.

I'm a couple weeks late on this...

From Weekly Mail's 2016 Year in Review Part I

May 28- WTF just happened? Please someone tell me Thor didn't just get run for that pitch to Utley?

I love my buddy Dan (No Shot) Unverzagt, but I don't care what he says, Thor shouldn't have been thrown out. 
Background, Mets pitcher Noan Syndergaad was thrown out of the Mets game against the Dodgers for throwing behind Chase Utley. My stance was and still is, if Thor wanted to nail Utley, he would have. 

One thing you know about me, when it's time to fess up and admit I was wrong, I'll do so. I argued day and night that with Noah Syndergaard's control, if he wanted to nail Chase Utley, he would have, so there is no way he was really throwing at him right?

Terry Collins, of all people, said I was wrong.

Caution-Strong Language.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XkJgN7N6WJo



So Thor starts off by basically saying what I said when it happened... It was a pitch that got away. "Are you f-cking kidding me? I'm just throwing a fastball," he says to the crew chief Tom Hallion. "No way. That aint gonna happen", Hallion responds.

Neal Walker then asks Hallion "Shouldn't there just be a warning?" Hallion tries to explain that because of the history, that no warning was necessary. (I call bull$h-t on that, but whatever). As he's explaining this to Walker by saying, "our a$$es are in a jackpot if we don't do anything," the crowd, already wild, raises it up a few notches, as Collins is obviously going bat$hit on home plate umpire Adam Hamari.

Hallion sprints over and tells the other umpires to "take him take him" (I assume he means make sure Thor leaves the field) and yells at Collins whose calling Hamari "a c-cks-cker" among other things,  to "get a handle" and "talk to me"



Collins: Tommy that's f-cking bullshit and you know it! You gotta give us a shot. You gotta give us a shot Tom..
Hallion: Listen to me and hear what I'm saying OK? You get your shot. You had your shot right there in the situation. You know the situation Terry. You know the situation Terry. 
Collins: I know it. Why can't we get a shot Tommy? 
Hallion: Because that makes it worse. 
Collins: Bullshit! 
Hallion: Terry! That makes it f-cking worse
Collins: But MLB did nothing to that guy! Nothing! 
Hallion: Ok, that that.. I can't control that Terry, I can't control that. You know as well as I do Terry, you know where I stand on the whole f-cking situation. 
Collins: But you're better than that Tommy, you know that. 
Hallion: Terry listen I'm telling you, our a$$ is in the jackpot now, OK? I'm just telling you.
Collins: That f-cking motherf-cker 
Hallion: You know what? You got it. You got everything out? 

Now watching that pitch again sail at least three feet behind Utley, I still have a hard time fathoming that Syndergaard should have been tossed. But instead of Collins screaming that the pitch was nowhere close to Utley, he's arguing that since MLB did nothing to Utley, that Collins left it up to Thor to take care of it. Sort of like Col. Jessup ordering the Code Red in A Few Good Men. (See I can make movie references too)

My question is, would Hallion have tossed Thor? Was he sticking up for his umpire? Or did he really feel that he should have been run?   I guess we'll never really know that.

All I know is, two years later, I have to admit I was wrong.


SOCCER; The FIFA World Cup.

The biggest sporting event in the world, bigger than the Super Bowl, bigger than the Olympics. The older I get, the more I appreciate the enormity of it.

This version of the World Cup hasn't captured my imagination quite as much. For one thing, I have no real interest in any of the teams in it. The US spit the bit and didn't qualify, and neither did Ireland. Who the hell am I going to root for?

Actually, with Mexico having beaten Germany and South Korea, they could be a fun team to watch.

The other issue is that the tournament is being held is Russia. Which means 1) some of the games are early in the morning, and 2) They are sure to be corrupt. So maybe it's a blessing my two teams didn't qualify.

Anyhoo, here is a little Bar Room B.S re: the World Cup

http://barroombs.blogspot.com/2018/06/the-world-cup.html


It was a rough week. Know what always cheers me up? The Beatles.

If you didn't get to see it, please watch James Corden's carpool karaoke through Liverpool with Paul McCartney. I won't spoil it for you, but what could be cooler than going into a barber shop on Penny Lane to get a haircut? That is now on my bucket list.

ALSO, I stumbled upon this on Youtube last week. After the Beatles breakup, George Harrison put out his classic triple album All Things Must Pass. Included on that was probably my favorite Harrison song What is Life?.

So a couple years back, George's widow Olivia and son Dhani, held a contest for someone to produce a video for What is Life.

The winner was someone named Brandon Moore, who showed two dancers from the San Francisco ballet..

We were totally surprised and delighted by this video and it was a clear favourite for both of us. The dancer really expressed unbounded joy, and managed to capture the spirit of “What is Life” through movement, which the director captured beautifully. Thank you to each and every filmmaker for all of their time, effort and care, and above all their love for George and his music which is evident in all of these videos – it has been a real pleasure to watch them!”
Olivia & Dhani Harrison


Anyway here is the video. Again, if this doesn't at least make you feel a little bit better, well, what can I do?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fiH9edd25Bc



Enjoy the long sunsets

and Have a Great Week!

Weekly Mail June 10,2018

Hey There:

Last week, Timmy's class had a Living Wax Museum at his school. Each of the kids chose a famous person, created a display, did research, wrote a speech and then had to dress up like the character and when you came to their spot, you stepped on a "button" and they gave their talk.

Tim chose Paul McCartrney as his historical figure. Some people laughed when I told them that, but think about it. What constitutes a historical figure? In the most general terms, it's someone who changes the world around us. I can't think of too many people who did that to a greater degree than the Beatles did in the 1960's. The changed the way people wore their clothes, their hair and that's even before we get to what they did musically. I'm biased, because a) he's my kid and b) I'm a Beatlemaniac, but his choice was solid.

But having said all that I'm proud of all these kids. I got to go there with  my mom and dad, and it was one of the most amazing experiences I've ever had. The work that these 9 and 10 year olds did was tremendous. I saw how hard Timmy worked on this, and I know all the kids worked hard. They had to.

And while he was working hard to memorize his lines, part of me felt bad for him. Then I started to remember the plays we put on in St. Mary's and how many lines I had to memorize, even in 1st and 2nd grade.

But what these kids did was harder.

When I was up on the stage, I knew the people were looking at me, but I had the option of looking back towards the balcony. These kids had to recite an entire speech, with a big doofus like me right in front of them. That could not have been easy.

But they did it. All of them.

I wish I could post pictures of all the kids in their characters, but obviously I wouldn't want someone posting Timmy's pic without permission.  Here he is..

There is so much crap in the world right now, and as Billy Joel once sang, "I find that just surviving is a noble fight", but between seeing these kids on Tuesday, and then watching Timmy receive his badge from the Cub Scouts on Friday, I quote another historical figure... "I consider myself the luckiest man on the face of the earth."

Maybe not. But pretty damn lucky.



Who is not lucky? That be our New York Mets.


BASEBALL: The hitless wonders...

I had it pointed out to me this week by the great Keri DeAngelo that the Mets starting pitchers ERA was 1.76 over the past 10 games. Their record in those 10 games? 2-8. And that was a few days ago. It's only gotten worse.

People are encouraging me to declare the season over. That way, like in 2015 when they made it to the World Series and 2016, when they just missed the playoffs after I said they were done, they may go on another tear. And therein lies the rub.

They can go on another tear.

It's impossible to see now, especially when they are getting trashed by the Yankees, but if the starting pitching holds serve, and the bats get going, they can get right back in this thing.

Where I will totally lose my $h-t is if the injuries start to pile up again, like it's beginning to look like they are. That I can't stomach. I can't go through another year of my fellow Met fans lamenting "Oh, if Cespides wasn't hurt" or "Oh, wait till we get Thor back," or "I can't wait to see Matz when he's healthy."

No, no, NO!

Syndergaard needs to come back and stay healthy, if he can't do that, send his a$$ packing. La Famillia is back on the DL too, and he's already on my $h-t lost for blowing saves, if he can't stay healthy or close out games when he is, then hasta la vista to him as well. My first instinct with Cespedes was to let him walk, both after 2015 and 2016, but I'll admit I was happy when they signed him. Now I wish I had stuck with my first instinct.

If the team was legitimately lousy like they were in 2011 and 2012, you just look for bright spots and hope for the best. But when you have guys like Jacob deGrom pitching their hearts out only to be betrayed by a lousy bullpen and non-existent bats, it's doubly aggravating.  Part of me wants to throw in the towel, part of me wants them to see if they can get another bat in here to kick start the offense and hold our noses and pray for the bullpen. Part of me thinks I should just stop watching sports all together.

Then what would I have to write about?

So on we go....


After Tim's Cub Scout ceremony, I went with his den leader, Paul, and our good friend Dan (No Shot) Unverzagt to jPaul's where I caught a bit of the end of the NBA Finals. The night before, the hockey season came to an end with the Caps hoisting their first Stanley Cup.

The NBA got what it deserved... a lousy NBA Final between two teams we're all sick of. Shame on the Celtics, Raptors and Pacers for not knocking the Cavs out sooner. I realize LeBron is a one man wrecking crew, but $h-t that team was ripe for the picking.

And I'm sorry, but I still won't put the Warriors on the list of all time great NBA Teams. The Celtics and Lakers of the 1980's, the Bulls of the 1990's and the Heat from a few years ago were all better than this Warriors team. Don't get me wrong, they are worthy champs, but they are big fish in a small pond.

As for the Stanley Cup, Washington deserved to win, I just didn't want them to. And the Golden Knights picked a damn good time to play like the expansion team that they are.

One thing that always blows my mind is that on the rare times where a team wins the Cup in the opposing teams barn, the fans don't leave. They stay for the initial celebration, the handshake line (which I always think is cool) and the awarding of the playoff MVP. (the Conn Smythe Trophy) That's followed by, as my friend Ed Robinson points out, the only time in sports that an inanimate object is introduced as if it's a person (Ladies and Gentlemen-The Stanley Cup) followed by the requisite booing of Gary Bettman, followed by Bettman's presenting the Cup to the winning captain. Folks, I love to boo Bettman as much as anyone, but if I was at the Garden when the Rangers lost the Cup, I would be halfway between Woodside and Jamaica on the LIRR by the time Bettman handed the Cup over.

When the Mets blew a playoff shot for the second year in a row back in 2008, they had a ceremony to close Shea Stadium down. I was home with Tara and baby Timmy that day, but my dad and Kate were at the game. I told them I would have left after the last pitch and they said they were honoring the old guys, not the current team. My dad and my sister have much more class than I do. I would have been long gone. 


HORSE RACING-Triple Crown!!

In a previous life, I worked at NYC OTB. One of these days, when I know all the people I worked with there are no longer with us, I may write some stories about what went on while I was taking bets there, but even though it's been almost 20 years since I worked there, I was told what went on behind the counter stayed there.

One thing I can tell you is that in the three years I worked there, each Belmont Stakes had a potential Triple Crown Winner. In 1997, Silver Charm had won the Derby and the Preakness, before falling in the Belmont. The following year, Real Quiet took the first two legs. In 1999 it was Charismatic.

None of those three won the Belmont.

In 2002, I actually made my way to Belmont Park to see if War Emblem could win the Triple Crown. Not only did he not, I ended up watching the race on TV, cuz where I was standing I couldn't see the track. (I did get to shake hands with Governor Pataki and legendary broadcaster Jim McKay.)

In 2004, the Belmont was held the same day Liam McGarvey was baptized. I went home from the christening to watch the race, and was pissed that Smarty Jones lost the triple crown by a nose, till I realized that by wheeling the exacta, I had won $300 bucks.

In 2008, Big Brown was considered by many to be the horse to finally end the 30 year hex. He was listed as a huge favorite, but a bum hoof wouldn't even allow him to finish the race.

It was at that point I seriously began to believe that we would never again see a Triple Crown winner in horse racing.

2012, I'll Have Another. Scratched before the Belmont. The hex continued. 34 years and counting.

The 2014 Belmont would be what I would call A Rough Day in Sports. California Chrome lost a chance to win the Triple Crown, the Rangers lost Game 2 of the Stanley Cup Finals to the Kings, and the Mets lost a game in the bottom of the ninth inning.

So when American Pharaoh was getting ready to run in the Belmont in 2015, I didn't really get into it. Shoot, even after he won, I thought maybe the doctors had given me some funny medicine to fix my heart and I was actually seeing things. I had been screaming that we would never see it happen.

Now, we've seen it twice.

Damn. 



I didn't watch any of Anthony Bourdain's cooking shows, and I wasn't really familiar with Kate Spade, but their suicides this week were a harsh reminder that we just really never know. I don't know if this is what George Harrison had in mind when he wrote about "the people who gain the world and lose their soul." But that's what came to mind when I saw that these two successful people took their lives this week.

I usually like to end these on a positive note, but please folks, take it easy.


Have a Great Week

Weekly Mail June 3, 2018

Hey:

Friday night, Tim and I went to see Avengers: Infinity War. I would love to do a movie review about it, but I honestly couldn't tell you what it was about.

I'm late to the show on this, I know. I saw Black Panther back in early April and I enjoyed and I had some idea what the hell was happening. This movie? No clue. They may as well have been speaking another language with no subtitles.

Timmy really wanted to see it. I had no interest, but I wanted to wait to see Solo with Tara and Timmy. (Tara had something else going on). So Avengers it was.

It was too involved for me. Too many planets, too many characters. I needed a scorecard to keep up. Timmy to his everlasting credit, tried to explain it to me, but (and this is no fault of his whatsoever,) it made it more confusing.

The best explanation he gave me was that I had to see the first couple of movies to understand what was going on. I jumped in right in the middle of the series. Honestly I'm not all that interested in catching up.

Years ago, Karl, Ray and I saw a movie called The Grifters, which we saw only because we were big John Cusack fans. I didn't quite understand that one either, and there were two old men behind us kept saying "I don't understand what's going on here." That's how I felt with this one. Also, on Good Friday, 1999, I saw the Matrix with Kevin Woods and our co-worker Serge. Again, no clue, no matter how much Woodsy and Serge tried to break it down for me.






TELEVISION: Roseanne Barr-ed!

Whenever we have a mess where someone says something unfortunate, I have a tendency to sympathize with the person who said it. Because I know it could happen to anyone. Or at least anyone who writes or speaks in an open forum.

Every week, I write this thing on Saturday, then I sleep on it, review it a couple times on Sunday afternoon, before putting it out. Every once in a while, I'll e-mail someone to look it over, make sure I didn't cross any lines. I sometimes speak about touchy topics and a lot of times I try to go for laughs. That combo can be dangerous.

Last week was a perfect example. I had written something about the new NFL policy about the national anthem, and although I felt strongly in what I wrote, I decided to take it out. I just didn't feel that was the time or place for it.

I do believe that we have in some ways become more thin skinned and touchy. That the ability to laugh at ourselves has become a lost art. I suppose that is part and parcel of the world that we live in, that with social media, our audiences have become bigger.  Plus with all the piss and vinegar coming out in Washington, everybody is more on edge than ever.

Having said that, what Roseanne Barr tweeted out last week is utterly indefensible. I mean, there is no other way to spin it.

I don't know much about Valerie Jarrett, but NOBODY deserved that kind of treatment. And the gracious, classy way Jarrett handled this made the insult even more harsh.

It's not a freedom of speech issue folks. That kind of insult goes way over the line. This isn't a red state/blue state issue, this is about right and wrong. And Roseanne was about as wrong as you can get.

If her only defense is that she is hooked on Ambien or she has multiple personalities, then someone needs to get her help, but judging from her history of tweets, it sounds like she's done this before.

It's funny, someone brought up Roseanne grabbing herself after singing the national anthem at a Padres game in 1990, and to be honest, that's when I stopped watching her show on ABC. I hadn't watched one episode of the reboot. (You know my feelings on reboots to begin with).


Now there were calls for TBS to cancel Samantha Bee's TBS show because she called Ivanka Trump a feckless c-nt. I happen to agree with both sides on that one. No, it's not the same as calling an African American an ape, and yes, she won't get fired because it was a Trump she insulted, and since her father insults people all the time, she'll skate.  Should she? Probably not. But she will.

_________________________________________________________________________________


HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU** HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU**  HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO

JOE NAMATH- This past Thursday, the one and only man to lead my beloved Jets to a Super Bowl win celebrated his 75th Birthday. The Post did a nice write up on him in last Sunday's paper, chronicling the Good (His Super Bowl guarantee and subsequent victory) The Bad, (The injuries that cost him whole seasons) and the Ugly (slobbering over Suzy Kolber on national TV).

One thing that was written that I found amusing was that he said he had no issue entertaining women the night before his games. Many athletes avoid getting it on the night before games, Namath said he welcomed it. The Post went on to say that Namath estimated that he slept with 300 women.

What?  That's a bit conservative don't you think? This is Broadway Joe we're talking about here! The man who liked his women blonde and his Johnnie Walker Red.  I mean, think about the times we are discussing here. The swingin 60's and early 70's.
300? That would be an off month for Wilt Chamberlain, am I right?

Be that as it may, with the Jets certain to be nowhere near the Super Bowl this year, January/February will mark their 50th year in a row without a Vince Lombardi trophy. I've said it before that I believe Joe Willie made a pact with the devil that fateful January in Miami back in 1969. After all, the Jets were 18.5 underdogs to the Baltimore Colts that day, and just about every expert predicted the Colts would do to the Jets in Super Bowl III what the Packers did to the Chiefs and Raiders in Super Bowls I & II respectively. That is-blow them out. Instead, it was Namath running off the field in Miami's Orange Bowl waving a triumphant finger in the air. We may never see that again. I'm fairly certain we won't.

So maybe I should blame Namath instead of celebrating him, but I can't do that. I was too young to see him play, to me he was the Brut 33 guy when I was a kid. But I'm glad he was on my team. And you can throw all the f-cking stats at me you want, he belongs in the Hall of Fame. Without him, the Super Bowl is nowhere near the extravaganza it is now. The NFL is not the behemoth it has become.
He put the AFL on the map. He's an American original.

Happy 75th Joe!

BASKETBALL: Knucklehead Smith

I refuse to watch the NBA Finals. I have no interest.

I'm sick of seeing the Cavs and the Warriors. When I wanted the Warriors to win, the Cavs won. When I wanted Cleveland to win, Golden State won. Now I wish they would both lose. Let it end in a 3-3 tie, or something. I've never rooted for the Celtics in my life, and I wanted them to send LeBron packing. But no dice.

I didn't see JR Smith's boneheaded mistake the other night, but my news feed was clogged with posts, memes and clips, so I know what the hell happened. And of course the first thing that popped into my mind was something that happened back when Smith was playing for the Knicks, and our guys actually believe it or not, were in the playoffs. Smith was having a horrible shooting series against the Pacers, and music superstar Rihanna had a theory..

....he's f-ckin up cuz his a$$ be hungover from clubbing every night during playoffs. " Riri tweeted on May 17, 2013.

After seeing what he did Thursday night, I'm not sure he wasn't hitting the hard stuff at halftime.


Tim had his last lacrosse match for the season Sunday in Massapequa. I know the calendar says June 3, but I felt like I watching this game at Lambeau Field in January.  WTF is with this weather?

But June is always a fun month. Summer is pretty much in da house.

And that's a good thing.

Have a Great Week